


A Logical Chain of Illogical Events

by mismatched_ideas



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Canon Related, Getting Together, M/M, Mostly Canon Compliant, One Shot, Pining, Slow Burn, Stupid Boys, i guess?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-08
Updated: 2018-12-08
Packaged: 2019-09-14 05:00:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,885
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16906566
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mismatched_ideas/pseuds/mismatched_ideas
Summary: It was only logical that Akaashi wasn’t a starter his first year of high school. He didn’t expect to be. He was just happy to have been accepted to a school that was not only a volleyball powerhouse but also an academic one. He played in a handful of practice matches near the end of the year and during the Tokyo finals at the end of the year, he’d been the backup setter, which was impressive given his age.But there wasn’t a single thing that was more surprising than the attention he received from a certain second year.





	A Logical Chain of Illogical Events

**Author's Note:**

> I nearly burned myself out during NaNoWriMo trying to write to fics at once so I had to take a break. Welcome to that break. Because of that and time constraints, this is only minorly edited.

It was only logical that Akaashi wasn’t a starter his first year of high school. He didn’t expect to be. He was just happy to have been accepted to a school that was not only a volleyball powerhouse but also an academic one. He played in a handful of practice matches near the end of the year and during the Tokyo finals at the end of the year, he’d been the backup setter, which was impressive given his age.

But there wasn’t a single thing that was more surprising than the attention he received from a certain second year. 

Bokuto Koutarou was a bit of mystery to Akaashi. He didn’t understand a lot of what the second year did or why, but he was an amazing player who was well loved by the team despite his frequent mood swings. Despite the mood swings, he was already an amazing player when he started high school. By his second year, everyone knew how good he was now and how good he could be, so while he hadn’t been passed the title of ace quite yet, it was assumed it would happen at the end of second year. 

Thus, Akaashi had no idea why from almost the moment Akaashi arrived, Bokuto seemed interested in talking to him. It wasn’t even like at the time Akaashi was anything more than your average first year. 

At first, he brushed it off as nothing more than friendliness until an acquaintance of his who was also a first year made a comment about the amount of time Akaashi spent with Bokuto. It had been a snide comment that Akaashi hadn’t appreciated but it did give him insight into this strange phenomena. 

It required further study, but Akaashi’s studies were thrown completely off when it was all but officially announced that he would be a starter during his second year after the current setter retired. After that, it made sense that Akaashi would spend more time with Bokuto since they were practicing more closely with each other. 

Except then Bokuto would start showing up at lunchtime, asking Akaashi if they could eat lunch together. Akaashi didn’t have any close friends, so he easily accepted even if he couldn’t understand why Bokuto would be hanging out with him so much.

The icing on the cake, though, came when Bokuto was named to be the next captain. Everyone expected it. Everyone knew. What nobody expected was that Bokuto would look at him and smile and tell Akaashi that he was going to be vice-captain. 

His first year of high school was altogether very strange.

He never quite figured out why he’d been named the vice-captain. He helped out with some strategy talk and he was good about keeping people in line, but that was about it. He was also only a first year and there were plenty of second years who would have made better, more sensible choices. 

There were a lot of different reactions to his being named as vice-captain. Most of the second-years seemed unsurprised, though Akaashi did notice that the entire time, Konoha was practically drilling holes into the side of Akaashi’s head. Among the other first years, there was a mix of surprise and what could only be described as jealousy. 

In the end, Akaashi decided that there had to have been a mistake. Maybe this was simply a cruel prank. But he couldn’t quite get up the courage to confront the most likely source of this… problem. Instead, he found himself waiting nervously for Konoha after practice. 

“You shouldn’t pick at your fingers like that,” Konoha said when he saw Akaashi waiting for him.

“Ah, Konoha-san.” Akaashi stood up straighter, his hands flying down to his sides. “I was wondering if it would be okay if I talked to you.”

Konoha raised an eyebrow at Akaashi then shrugged, “Sure, why not. Bokuto-kun will be disappointed he doesn’t get to walk home with you, though.” 

Konoha began to walk and after a second, Akaashi followed, jogging to catch up with him. 

“So, what’s up?” He asked, his disinterested calm almost putting Akaashi off of asking him the question. But then Akaashi remembered that this was definitely a facade so he took a breath and continued.

“I don’t want to sound ungrateful, but I feel like there’s been a mistake. Wouldn’t you or Washio-san or Sarukui-san be better choices for vice-captain? I’m only a first-year and it doesn’t seem to be fair.”

“There’s nothing fair to talk about,” Konoha glanced at Akaashi. “You were the best choice. I wasn’t interested in being vice-captain and neither was Washio-kun. We’re both just not going to have time between studying and volleyball practice. Sarukui-kun is a good guy, but he’s not really vice-captain material. If Bokuto had offered it to him, he probably would have turned him down. At Nationals, you proved that you are tactically minded and a good player. Just like it made sense to make you our starting setter next year, this made sense too.” Konoha glanced at Akaashi again. “Also, Bokuto-kun trusts you and that’s more important than anything else.”

“He trusts me?” 

“He had a breakdown in the middle of your first time playing at Nationals and you dealt with it like a pro,” Konoha pointed out. “Even Satou-senpai can’t always deal with Bokuto.” 

Konoha and Akaashi paused at a crossroads, both aware that they were going in different directions from here. 

“It just seems like a mistake.” 

“Stop it,” Konoha said, reaching out to knocking Akaashi’s hands down because he was picking at his cuticles again. “Trust your elders, okay? We know what we’re doing.” 

And so Akaashi had decided to accept the decision with as much grace as he could manage. 

With the beginning of his second-year began even more close contact with Bokuto. They ate together at lunch almost every day, often discussing various problems with or plans for the team. Most days they stayed late after practice because Bokuto wanted to keep practicing. On days off they often ended up studying together as Akaashi tried to get Bokuto to pass math this year.

The unfortunate turn of events that happened in Akaashi’s second year, though, was a realization that there was a growing fuzziness in the pit of Akaashi’s stomach when he was near Bokuto. As the feeling grew, his feeling that Bokuto had to realize also grew. Akaash would catch himself staring at Bokuto for longer than was natural and he found himself thinking more about Bokuto than was normal. 

And apparently, that was noticeable as well because while studying with some of his classmates, they would often complain that Bokuto was the only thing Akaashi ever talked about. He’d thought they were simply blowing it out of proportion because, honestly, he wasn’t very talkative so maybe percentage-wise, he did talk about Bokuto a lot. This theory was proved wrong when, while helping their new first-year manager, Suzumeda Kaori, and the tall first-year starter, Onaga Wataru, carrying some boxes after practice. 

“Akaashi-senpai, can I ask you a question?” Suzumeda asked, seeming a little nervous.

“Sure,” Akaashi said, watching as Suzumeda and Onaga shared a quick look and what Akaashi swore was a nod. 

“Are you and Bokuto-senpai dating?”

Akaashi blinked at them, his face heating up in a hopefully unnoticeable way. He doubted it was unnoticeable. 

“Dating?” Akaashi asked, unable to mask his surprise. 

“Yeah…” Suzumeda shrank a little. “Sorry if that was too personal. It’s just… you guys spend so much time together and, like, you’re always worrying about Bokuto-senpai…” Suzumeda bit her lip. “Sorry, I guess that was too personal.”

“It’s fine,” Akaashi assured, regaining control over his face. “I was just surprised. No, we’re not dating. I don’t even know if Bokuto-san is interested in men or women. Though he seems pretty interested in women.” 

“Oh, well, sorry if that was weird then,” Suzumeda apologized again. “Umm… Oh, thanks for helping us with this.”

“No problem. I’ll be sure to remind the other first-years that they should be helping you. All I’ll tell the second-years that just because they’re not first-years doesn’t mean they don’t have to help.” 

Suzumeda sped up to get in front of Akaashi and Wataru, her cheeks red. Even though Akaashi and Wataru were taller, Suzumeda had pretty long legs and neither boy was trying to walk all that fast, so soon she was quite a distance ahead of them.

“Sorry,” Wataru said quietly, not looking at Akaashi. “We weren’t trying to gossip about you, but the first years all sort of thought you two were dating.” 

“It’s fine,” Akaashi repeated. “I don’t mind. It’s not like you were being mean about it. You just wanted to know. I’d rather you ask than just speculating, anyway.”

“That’s good to know,” Wataru said, nodding and then falling quiet for the rest of the time. 

By the time they’d said goodbye to each other and Akaashi headed out towards home, he was lost in his own thoughts and was more than a little surprised when Bokuto was waiting for him. 

“Bokuto-san.” Akaashi blinked at him, willing his cheeks not to redden. “You didn’t have to wait.”

“I wanted to, though,” Bokuto responded with a smile. “It was nice of you to help them.” 

“I’m a second-year, not a god and I can carry a few boxes.”

“It was still nice.” Bokuto furrowed his eyebrows. “Is something wrong, Akaashi?” 

Akaashi blinked at his captain, his teammate, and his friend who he’d always suspected would one day notice his growing crush and found he wasn’t ready to explain. Should he be truthful and try to make a joke about how the first-years thought they were dating? Should he lie? Should he tell the truth about why that rumor had so firmly attached itself to his thoughts? 

No, he knew that the last option was not going to work. The first one might work if Akaashi was anyone else, but there was no way he’d be able to play it as a joke. He just wasn’t very good at jokes. So, he’d have to make up a lie. He wasn’t a bad liar when he could come up with a good lie, but right now he found himself completely unable to come up with one. So, instead, he went with avoidance. 

“I’m not sure what you mean, Bokuto-san, I feel fine.” 

“I don’t believe you,” Bokuto said. “Something is definitely wrong.” 

“I really have no clue what you’re talking about.” 

Bokuto pouted at Akaashi, “Lying isn’t nice.”

“Neither is pushing people to talk,” Akaashi answered, more heat in his words than he intended. 

“So you admit something is wrong,” Bokuto continued, undeterred by Akaashi’s aggressive response. 

“I didn’t admit anything,” Akaashi grumbled, speeding up to put himself further in front of Bokuto. 

Of course, that only worked for the few seconds that Bokuto was surprised by Akaashi’s response. Bokuto was taller and had longer legs so it was easy for him to catch up. 

“Akaashi, come on, you’re freaking me out.” 

Akaashi felt suddenly annoyed. What right did Bokuto have to pester him about this? What right did Bokuto have to be so kind and compassionate and attractive? 

His annoyance reaching its peak, Akaashi found he had to decide the best course of action. He had three he could think of:

He could tell Bokuto the truth about his crush and explain what Suzumeda had asked him  
He could lie to Bokuto about what was bothering him  
He could, literally, run away

Akaashi knew he’d never convince himself to go through with choice A, he was way too anxious for that. Choice C was the most attractive but would probably lead to Bokuto chasing Akaashi, and Akaashi wasn’t sure he could outrun Bokuto. Actually, he was pretty sure he couldn’t and, at least for now, things weren’t desperate enough for him to test that theory. 

“I did poorly on a quiz in English,” he lied smoothly, pausing to turn and look at Bokuto with his best imitation of the noncommittal blank-look that Konoha often used with Akaashi. “I didn’t want to bother you with. It wasn’t a failing grade, simply lower than expected.” 

“Oh, okay,” Bokuto said, blinking slowly. “You know, if you need some help with English, Yukie-chan and I sometimes study English together. I know my English isn’t great, but Yukie-chan might be a good practice partner for you.”

A new and completely unwelcome thought arrived in Akaashi’s mind that sounded just like the question Suzumeda had asked him. 

_Are Bokuto-san and Shirofuku-san dating?_

“Thank you for the suggestion, Bokuto-san,” Akaashi answered stiffly, trying to push out the likely absurd thought that had entered his mind. “But it really was just one quiz, I’m sure I’ll be fine. Thank you for your concern, now we both better hurry home so we can study properly before bed.” 

“Okay, good night,” Bokuto said as Akaashi turned to head towards his home.

“Good night,” Akaashi responded, trying his best not to think about how the idea of Bokuto dating someone hurt so much. 

After that things more or less went back to usual. Bokuto didn’t comment on how strangely Akaashi had acted and he also didn’t change his normal behavior. Akaashi did his best to not change how he was acting, though he did his best to curtail his Bokuto related problems like staring. 

He still stared too much, but Bokuto was rarely looking so it seemed okay. With everyone else, he would always be able to come up with a clever lie to explain why he was always looking at Bokuto. Akaashi was a good liar except with Bokuto, so as long as he didn’t have to explain himself to Bokuto, he’d be fine. 

In the first of the two national tournaments in Akaashi’s second-year, Fukurodani made it to the semi-finals before losing. Even with the loss, the entire team had felt pretty great because of their spectacular win in the quarter-finals. Despite losing the first set, they come back to win the rest of the match, mostly because Bokuto had been in top shape. And at the end of the final set, Bokuto had given Akaashi a tight hug and thanked him for reasons Akaashi couldn't understand but accepted if it meant he could get a hug from Bokuto. 

The semi-final match had gone poorly, with everyone tired. Mistakes were made and their normally tight team started to tear at the seams. Between being tired and Bokuto having a pretty bad downturn halfway through the match, the team couldn’t keep it together. 

After the loss, Bokuto gave a pep talk that was uplifting like always and everyone started to feel a little better. Everyone except Akaashi. 

Despite being more tired than he thought he’d ever been, Akaashi found he could sleep and ended up slipping out of the building to take a walk in the cool night air. At some point, he realized his body was too tired for a real walk, though, and so he sat on a bench as he stared up at a practically star-less sky. 

“You should be asleep.”

Akaashi jumped up from the bench, surprised that Bokuto had not only known Akaashi left but also that Bokuto had been able to find him. 

“Bokuto-san, I could say the same for you.”

“I was worried when you left.”

“I’m surprised you were even awake,” Akaashi said quietly, the nighttime around them making him more comfortable but also more aware of the quality and volume of his voice. “You should really be sleeping.”

“I guess I couldn’t sleep,” Bokuto said truthfully, sitting down on the bench. “I messed up today.”

After a moment of hesitation, Akaashi sat down next to Bokuto. 

“You didn’t mess up.”

“I’m, like, almost eighteen and I can’t keep my emotions in check long enough to not lose us a game.” Bokuto looked like he was deep in thought. “I’m this teams captain and half the time during games all I do is make the team’s lives harder.” 

“It’s not your fault,” Akaashi insisted. “I know you don’t do it on purpose or anything.” 

“I’m just… Sometimes it feels like I’m a terrible ace.” 

“You’re really not,” Akaashi said, shaking his head. “If anything, I’m a terrible setter. I made a lot of mistakes today. I should have supported you and the team better.” 

“What?” Bokuto looked up at Akaashi, shaking his head. “You did so great today! You’d make a better captain than me. You can keep the team together even when I crumble.” 

“That’s not true.” Akaashi looked at Bokuto with hard eyes. “Even when you’re at your lowest, you’re still the thing that keeps us together. You might not realize it, but even at times when I’m not setting to you, the entire team works well because of you.”

“Then it can’t be your fault we did bad,” Bokuto said. “It has to be mine.”

“That’s not what I mean,” Akaashi asserted. “I’m the one who makes a lot of the calls during the game and I made a lot of bad ones.” 

“If you’re gonna’ say I’m not to blame, then you can’t blame yourself either,” Bokuto argued. 

Akaashi sighed, “Fine. I guess if we win as a team we have to lose as one too.” 

_”There’s no I in team,”_ Bokuto said in English, making Akaashi laugh a quiet, nearly noiseless laugh. 

“I guess you’re right.” Akaashi realized he was picking at his cuticles again and shoved his hands into his pockets. “I can’t believe you remembered that idiom.” 

“Hey, I’m pretty good at English,” Bokuto told Akaashi with a pout before leaning over to put his head on Akaashi’s shoulder, sending a jolt of fire through Akaashi. “I’m tired now.” 

“Then go to sleep,” Akaashi answered, hoping he was keeping his voice even.

“I will,” Bokuto yawned, “in a little bit.” 

Akaashi found himself drifting off too and both he and Bokuto fell asleep on the bench for a few minutes before Konoha found them and woke them up with nothing more than an eye-roll when they both groggily realized they’d fallen asleep. 

They didn’t talk much about that night afterward, but Akaashi had trouble forgetting it. He could feel the heat of Bokuto’s body leaning against his and he could feel the warm breaths just barely grazing his shoulder. 

With summer came training camp and more questions that came, unwarranted, to Akaashi’s attention. This time, from Kurasano’s firey first-year middle-blocker.

“Akaashi-san,” Hinata asked Akaashi one night while they were both taking a quick break to drink some water. “Can I ask you something?”

“Of course.” Akaashi liked Kurasano and like Hinata, mostly because he thought the way he basically idolized Bokuto despite having just met him was really adorable. Sure, Hinata was only a year below Akaashi, but he very much seemed like a much younger brother. “What’s wrong?”

“Oh, nothing’s wrong.” Hinata shifted in an almost uncomfortable way before asking his question. “Are Bokuto-san and Kuroo-san dating?” 

Akaashi blinked at Hinata then looked at where Bokuto and Kuroo were pestering Tsukishima. 

“I don’t think so,” Akaashi said slowly. “But I’ve never asked him. Bokuto-san and I don’t talk much about relationships.” 

“Oh.” Hinata nodded. “Okay.” 

Akaashi looked back at Hinata, remembering again that they were actually pretty close in age and that maybe for as empty-headed as he appeared to be, maybe an outside party would be helpful in regard to Akaashi being able to voice things he didn’t want to be questioned. 

Which was all a fancy way for Akaashi to rationalize the direction of their conversation. 

“Do you and… Kageyama-kun talk about relationships?” 

“Not really,” Hinata said with a pout. “Whenever I try to ask him about people he gets all weird and runs off.”

“I guess he doesn’t like talking about it.” Akaashi nodded to himself. “I know where he’s coming from.”

“Really?” Hinata seemed puzzled. “If you’re friends with someone shouldn’t it be easy?”

“Well, there are a lot of reasons it might not me,” Akaashi responded. “It could be someone you’re both friends with. It could be an embarrassing crush. It could be the friend.”

Hinata’s face gained a curious look that was accompanied by the slightest blush.

“You think Kageyama… likes me?”

“I didn’t say that,” Akaashi said with a small shake of his head. “I don’t know Kageyama-kun so I can’t say either way. Of course, the easiest way to find out would be just to ask him.”

“I couldn’t do that,” Hinata insisted, shaking his head vigorously. 

“Why not?” When Hinata didn’t respond, Akaashi smiled slightly. “Do _you_ like Kageyama-kun?”

“Ah, what? No! Of course not! Why would you think that?” Hinata’s entire face turned red and he looked around wildly. “Uh oh, looks like, umm, Tsukishima needs me! Thanks for the talk!” 

Akaashi smiled after Hinata who practically ran back towards the others, which immediately lead to Bokuto and Kuroo pestering him about what happened. The rest of the night mostly consisted of them joking that Akaashi had charmed Hinata and that was why Hinata had gotten so red. Akaashi allowed it the jokes mostly because he knew that the jokes were better for Hinata than them actually finding out what had turned him so red. 

Later, while they were getting ready for bed Bokuto did have some questions. 

“What were you and Chibi-chan talking about earlier?” 

“He had heard some interesting gossip and was wondering if it was true,” Akaashi explained noncommittally even though he knew Bokuto would make him explain. 

“Wait, what gossip?” Bokuto asked as expected. “You gotta tell me!” 

“He asked if you and Kuroo-san are dating.” 

“And what did you tell him?” Bokuto asked, leaning towards Akaashi. 

“I said I didn’t know for sure, but I didn’t think so.” As an afterthought, he added. “If I’m incorrect, feel free to correct me.”

Bokuto blinked a few times then laughed. 

“No way. He’s not even my type.” 

“Really?” Akaashi asked. “I wasn’t aware you had a type. Especially not a type for men.”

“I guess we don’t talk about that stuff much.”

“We don’t really talk about it, period,” Akaashi reminded Bokuto and getting ready to head to bed. “Good night, Bokuto-san.” 

“Wait,” Bokuto called. “Why don’t we ever talk about that stuff? Aren’t we friends? Don’t friends do that?” 

“I guess it’s never come up,” Akaashi answered, aware he was on thin ice right now. Even the smallest wrong move could be the end for him. “Would you like to talk about it?” 

“I mean, I won’t if it’ll make you uncomfortable.” 

“If you would… enjoy talking about… romance, I am more than willing. I’m afraid I won’t have much input, though.” 

“Wait! The whole team should talk about it!” Bokuto shouted. “Like a bonding session.” 

Akaashi weighed the likelihood that he’d give away more than he meant to if he was alone with Bokuto versus with the team close by.

“That might be nice,” Akaash decided, hoping that despite Bokuto’s being there, he’d still regain his ability to lie to the rest of the team. “I suppose you want to do it tonight instead of sleeping?”

“We’re young!” Bokuto defended. “Now go tell everyone not to fall asleep before I finish in here.” 

Akaashi gained quite a bit of knowledge from their ‘bonding session’ though very little of it was particularly useful. Mostly he found that now he knew too much about his teammates' tastes in men and women. And, honestly, he didn’t learn much about Bokuto’s tastes, though he did have Bokuto’s sexuality confirmed as bisexual. 

According to Bokuto, his perfect woman was shorter than him—not hard to accomplish—with any color hair and any build. When he was insulted by Konoha for his lack of specificity Bokuto had pouted and said personality was more important before being petulantly quiet for the next ten minutes. 

Once Akaashi and everyone else was able to coax Bokuto out of his mood, they’d convinced him to explain what his type in men was. 

“Tall, smart, and dark-haired,” Bokuto said matter-of-factly, to which Akaashi raised an eyebrow.

“You realize you just described Kuroo-san, right?” 

“No I didn’t–” Bokuto paused. “Oh. Maybe I did. Well, he’s too tall! And Kuroo-kun is too loud.”

“Are you really calling someone too loud?” Konoha asked, earning him a glare from Bokuto. 

“I don’t know, okay! He’s not my type. It’s not easy to describe a type!” 

“I think you’re just bad at it,” Konoha remarked and everyone had laughed, but after that, there was no getting more information from Bokuto. 

Training camp passed quickly like it always did and soon they were all parting ways, back to training for the rapidly approaching prelims. 

As time went on, Akaashi found his crush only getting worse. He was getting better at shoving it out of the way, but that didn’t mean it wasn’t there. Especially after they made it past the prelims and to the Spring High National Tournament. Especially on one day in October as he realized how quickly his second-year was speeding by. 

The realization of how close he was to Bokuto leaving hit him at a less than opportune moment. Meaning, of course, it happened while there was a volleyball flying straight at his face. He had been, admittedly, staring at Bokuto again when it happened so he thought probably he’d deserved it. That said, he didn’t think he deserved to get a bloody-nose that put him on the sidelines until the bleeding stopped. 

For the remainder of practice, Bokuto had been concerned about Akaashi’s health more than was necessary. He insisted that they shouldn’t stay late today since Akaashi needed to rest his nose and so the entire team ended up walking back home together. The split for Akaashi and most of the team happened pretty early since most of them took the subway home while Akaashi could walk. Of course, there was one member of the team whose house was also in the same direction. 

He and Konoha walked in silence for a good three minutes before Konoha spoke up, not looking at Akaashi. 

“When are you going to tell him?”

“Excuse me?” 

“Your crush is pretty obvious.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Okay, so it’s not obvious to everyone since Wataru and Suzumeda-chan have been put off the scent already, but Yukie-chan and I know. It’s obvious.”

“I don’t have a crush on the Captain.” 

“And you also never call him 'the Captain.’”

Akaashi looked away, trying to decide how best to get out of this situation. Again, his brain wondered if sprinting the rest of the way home would work. There was a better chance of him outrunning Konoha, though, given his insistence on this conversation, Akaashi thought maybe he would still catch him.

“I don't see your point.”

“What is it that you're so afraid of?”

“I'm not afraid of anything.” Akaashi turned to glare at Konoha. “Because there's nothing to be afraid of.”

“Stop lying to me.” 

Akaashi stopped and turned to face Konoha fully, fire in his eyes as he tried to figure out why Konoha was pushing him.

“Who do you think you are?” 

Akaashi wasn't used to the anger flaring deep in his stomach like it was now. Usually, he could stay calm and collected even when he was angry, but it turned out the way Konoha could push buttons wasn't limited to opponents at volleyball games.

“You're not an expert on me, okay?’

“Maybe not,” Konoha smirked. “But I seem to know more about you than you do. For someone as smart as you, you're pretty stupid.”

“Fuck you.” Akaashi took a step towards Konoha. “You don't get to decide how I feel.”

“Not a decision,” Konoha said with a shrug. “Just an observation.”

Akaashi's anger boiled over and he reached out to grab Konoha by the shirt. Before he could say anything, there was the sound of running feet from the direction they come in and when Akaashi turned he saw that the universe truly hated him.

Bokuto came to a stop a meter or two from them, looking confused. Akaashi let go of Konoha, taking a few steps back while carefully doctoring his face. 

“Bokuto-san, is something wrong?”

“I… umm… that's what I was going to ask you.” Bokuto looked worriedly between Konoha and Akaashi. “What's going on.”

“Nothing.”

“It doesn't look like nothing…” Bokuto looked at Konoha for an explanation.

“Don't look at me, Akaashi's the one with something to say.”

Bokuto looked back at Akaashi.

“What's wrong?” 

Akaashi knew he was bad at lying to Bokuto and he was worried that even if he successfully told a lie, Konoha would give him away. 

Akaashi opened his mouth to speak then turned and bolted down the road at top speed, feeling immediately like an idiot, but completely unable to reverse this decision. He heard the sound of stuff dropping and running feet behind him and he didn’t dare look behind him. 

On the street, he passed a handful of people on the way back from school or work, but they didn’t seem to pay much mind to the teenager sprinting past them. He was sure they all just assumed it was part of some stupid teenager thing.

And, Akaashi knew this was a stupid teenager thing. Only a teenager would let a crush lead to them sprinting away from one of their best friends at full speed like a demon was chasing them. Then again, Akaashi had once seen Bokuto angry at someone and he was pretty sure that if he was being chased by an angry Bokuto, then he would have been better off being chased by a demon.

Akaashi wasn’t sure what his endgame was when he took a sharp turn into a shortcut through the park. He was weighed down by his bags and was shorter than the likely unencumbered Bokuto. 

Just as he thought maybe he could make it home before Bokuto caught up with him, someone grabbed the back of his shirt and Akaashi lost his balance, both him and the person—presumably Bokuto—went tumbling to the ground. While he was glad not to have fallen on pavement, Akaashi couldn’t say the packed dirt of this playground was much better. 

Akaashi turned over, ready to jump back up, but Bokuto moved faster, pinning Akaashi to the ground. Akaashi’s face flamed red, or redder than it already was from the sprinting, as he realized that Bokuto was, technically, straddling him. 

“Don’t make me finish this pin,” Bokuto said between gasps of air. “It won’t be fun for you.” 

Akaashi took a few moments to catch his breath then put on his best neutral mask, mustering all the composure he could attain at the moment. He was just glad that his red face would be interpreted as exclusively from physical exertion. 

“Bokuto-san, you can get off of me now.” 

“You won’t run?”

“I believe you’ve won.” 

Bokuto clambered off of Akaashi, but he remained on the ground, still trying to catch his breath. Akaashi sat up, deciding to keep to his word and stay put. He didn’t know now why he’d thought running was a good idea, but he would stay and face the consequences. 

“Explain,” Bokuto demanded. “Why did you look like you were about to punch Konoha-kun in the face? Why did you run?”

“Konoha-san is very good at pressing people’s buttons,” Akaashi explained slowly, doing his best not to look at Bokuto without looking like he was avoiding Bokuto’s gaze. “He was pushing me on things I didn’t want to be pushed on.” 

“What could he possibly have said?” Bokuto looked bewildered. “I’ve never seen you like this, Akaashi. First, you’re so spaced-out, you get hit in the face with a volleyball. Then you nearly punch Konoha-kun in the face and run away from me. What’s going on?”

Akaashi’s possible solutions to this problem were few and less than ideal. He could, of course, tell the truth, but that wasn’t going to happen until he had no other alternative. 

In the end, Akaashi was a bit of a coward. 

The other choice was lying, but since Akaashi found lying to Bokuto to be difficult, instead he decided to use lying’s close relative: omission of information. 

“Konoha-san simply brought up a topic I wasn’t very interested in talking about.”

“And what topic was that?”

“Bokuto-san, I don’t want to talk about it.”

“But we’re friends,” Bokuto pleaded. “God damn it, Akaashi, why won’t you even look at me? What did I do?” 

Akaashi looked up at Bokuto, hating the fact that Bokuto would think any of this was his fault. 

“This isn’t your fault.” Akaashi sighed deeply. “Not everyone is as trusting as you are. Not everyone is as comfortable talking about themselves.” 

Bokuto looked annoyed but he didn’t press the topic, instead sighing and letting his head drop. 

“I’m not asking you to trust anyone but me.” 

“Bokuto-san, it’s not that I don’t trust you. I just… can’t. Not right now.”

Akaashi realized he was what most people would consider a control freak. He wanted to be in control of everything he could be. He liked being in control of anything that was controllable. Volleyball had dampened that impulse considerably, but it was still there outside of volleyball. 

“Why not right now?” Bokuto asked, sounding more than a little petulant. “When?”

“Bokuto-san, I honestly have no idea.” Akaashi ran a hand through his hair. “Haven’t you ever had something you didn’t want to talk about?” 

“Sure, but–”

“I don’t want to talk about this,” Akaashi insisted. “I know you all mean well, but I just don’t want to talk about it.” 

Bokuto seemed conflicted, looking like he wanted to argue before he sighed deeply and frowned at the ground. After a moment of frowning, he picked himself up off the ground and reached a hand out to Akaashi.

It took Akaashi a few beats to realize what had happened, but when he did, he took the hand being offered to him and smiled a little at Bokuto. 

“Thank you, Bokuto-san.”

“Let me walk you home,” he said, not acknowledging Akaashi’s thanks. “Give me your sport bag.”

“I’m fine–”

“I tackled you,” Bokuto pointed out. “Give me the bag.” 

Akaashi handed the bag over without any more fuss and they walked towards Akaashi’s home in silence while Akaashi did his best not to let on how fast his heart was beating. Despite his best efforts, he was sure his face was a flaming red that even if Bokuto didn’t notice, his mother or father probably would. 

“This is it,” Akaashi said, waiting for Bokuto to hand his bag back. “I hope we didn’t keep Konoha-san waiting for too long.” 

“Ahh,” Bokuto’s tense mood dissolved as he seemed to think of something. “I forgot! The reason I ran after you two was because I realized I forgot to give you back the notebook with all the plays in it.” 

“Don’t worry about it, Bokuto-san, you can give it to me tomorrow.” Akaashi waited a beat but Bokuto still didn’t hand over the sport bag. “Bokuto-san, my bag.” 

“Oh!” Bokuto started a little as he held out Akaashi’s bag. “Sorry about tackling you.”

“Sorry about running.” Akaashi looked away for a moment. “It was very childish of me.”

“Honestly, it was kind of nice to know you’re a kid too,” Bokuto laughed. “Well, see you tomorrow, Akaashi.” 

“See you tomorrow, Bokuto-san.”

Bokuto paused for a moment, opening his mouth like he was going to say something before closing it again and just nodding. He didn’t move, though, and Akaashi realized he was waiting for Akaashi to go inside so with another nod, Akaashi retreated into his home. 

His parents did notice his red face, but more than that, they had questions about why Bokuto had walked him home. Sure, they knew Bokuto was the captain of the volleyball team and a good friend of Akaashi’s, but nobody ever walked home with Akaashi so they had questions that Akaashi dodged by saying he needed to do homework before disappearing into his room. 

The next month went too slow for Akaashi’s liking as stress piled up from every angle. By the time November was coming to an end, he started to feel like something had to give. There were only so many things he could keep juggling before one—or more—of them fell. With all the stress he was under, it was probably inevitable that Akaashi would find himself sick. He’d tried to go to school despite it, but his mother had insisted on taking his temperature and found that he had a low-grade fever.

So, he’d been forced back into bed after being given medicine and a strict command to relax. 

He spent most of the day in front of the TV, watching daytime television with the amount of concentration Akaashi usually reserved for listening to Konoha complain about his girlfriend. 

Since her office was the closest, Akaashi’s mother returned at lunchtime to give him more medicine and make sure he’d eaten. She also convinced Akaashi to go back to his bed and try to get some sleep. 

Akaashi couldn’t quite fall asleep completely, but he was able to get a little bit of sleep. He didn’t know what time it was when his doorbell rang. He pulled himself out of bed, pulling on a sweatshirt and a mask before heading to open the door.

He was surprised to find that Bokuto was the one at his door, even if he realized maybe he should be that surprised. 

“Bokuto-san,” Akaashi said, blinking a little before remembering his manners. “Come in.” 

“Oh, thanks!” Bokuto said, smiling like there wasn’t anything strange about this at all. “How are you feeling?” 

“I’m really not that bad,” Akaashi told him. “The only reason my mom made me stay home is that I have a fever.” 

“Well, she’s right. You need to relax, otherwise, you’ll get sicker.” Bokuto left his shoes at the door just a little askew, somehow not out of place next to Akaashi’s neatly lined up shoes. “I brought you notes from today. Oda said you guys were in the same class and he let me copy his notes. I’m the only one who knows where your house is, so I said I’d bring them.”

“Thank you, Bokuto-san,” Akaashi said, reaching out to take the notes Bokuto handed him. When he looked at them, he was surprised to see that he could read them with ease. “If you always took notes like this, maybe you’d be doing better in math.”

“Akaashi, that’s mean!” Bokuto complained. “And, I mean, I just copied Oda’s notes.” 

“I see,” Akaashi nodded. “Well, thank you for bringing them. You didn’t have to.” 

“I wanted to,” Bokuto responded with a smile before holding up the plastic bag in his other hand. “Also, I brought some stuff to eat!” 

“Thank you,” Akaashi repeated. “I have plenty of food, but that was thoughtful. I–”

Akaashi stopped to cough for a little, the longer his coughing continued the more concerned Bokuto looked. 

“Sorry,” Akaashi apologized, feeling a little dizzy after coughing so much. 

“Akaashi, don’t apologize, you’re sick.” Bokuto frowned. “When did you last take medicine?” 

“Umm…” Akaashi tried to think about what time his mom had come back at lunch, but he couldn’t place the time. “Sometime around lunch, I think. I don’t remember.” 

“Sit down,” Bokuto commanded, pointing to the couch. “Where’s the medicine?”

“I think my mom left it on the kitchen counter.” 

After a few moments of silence, Akaashi heard Bokuto speaking from the other room and it was immediately obvious he was on the phone. 

“Ah, hello Akaashi-san. Sorry to bother you, this is Bokuto Koutarou. I came over to give Akaashi some homework, but he doesn’t remember when he’s supposed to take more medicine.” Bokuto was mostly quiet for a little before laughing a little. “Of course, anytime. Thank you, Akaashi-san, sorry for bothering you. Mmhmm, sounds fine, okay, good-bye.” 

Bokuto reappeared after a few more minutes with a bowl of soup and some medicine. 

“Your mom said to make sure to take the medicine with food and that you should have taken more like an hour ago.” 

“Did you call my mom?” Akaashi asked. “I could have just texted her.” 

“Well, you didn’t.” Bokuto put the food and medicine down on the table and Akaashi slid onto the floor. 

“How do you even know her phone number?” 

Bokuto looked almost horrified for a moment, “Umm… Because… Reasons…”

Akaashi looked up at Bokuto suspiciously. “What is that supposed to mean?” 

“Nothing!” Bokuto insisted before crumbling under Akaashi’s glare. “Okay, okay, fine! I have it because she was helping us plan a birthday party for you. But now it’s ruined.” 

Akaashi looked at Bokuto for a while, probably too long based on the way Bokuto was looking at him worriedly. 

“You were planning a birthday party? For me?”

“Of course!” Bokuto pouted and sat down next to Akaashi. “You’re, like, my best friend.” 

Akaashi looked down at his barely eaten miso soup, his mind fuzzy and confused, but also panicking over something he could quite place. 

“Thanks again, for bringing this over,” Akaashi said. “It was really nice. You’re really nice.” 

Akaashi turned and found Bokuto looking at him with big eyes, seeming to be giving Akaashi his undivided attention. 

“You have to be careful in university,” Akaashi found himself saying. “Don’t let people walk all over you.” 

Bokuto seemed to deflate a little. 

“This year is going fast, isn’t it?” Bokuto asked, playing with the sleeve of his jacket. “We only have, like four months left.” 

“We’ll still be able to talk after you graduate,” Akaashi said, feeling like maybe he was asking too much of Bokuto. “If you want to, of course.”

“Of course, I want to!” Bokuto crossed his arms. “Didn’t you hear me say you’re my best friend?” 

“Sure, but…” Akaashi really wanted that medicine to kick in because right now he was having trouble not letting his mind drift. “Well, anyway, the year might almost be over, but you’ll only be in university. Half the universities you’re looking at are in Tokyo. You won’t be that far.”

“What about you?” Bokuto asked. 

“Me?”

“When you graduate won’t you go to some good university in Tokyo or America or something?” 

For as much as Akaashi liked to have everything in his life planned, he’d been honestly too busy to think more than a few months ahead. He just really hadn’t thought about university. 

“That’s a long way off,” he finally decided on. “We have a few more months in high school. Maybe a year of you in university. Then we’ll figure it out.” 

Akaashi paused, realizing how much it sounded like he was having a conversation with a girlfriend about how they’d be able to stay together forever. 

“Bokuto-san… from the moment you graduate, we’ll probably start drifting apart. Isn’t that what happens?” 

“No way,” Bokuto answered, more heat in his voice than seemed necessary. “I won’t let it.” 

“Bokuto-san–”

“No,” he interrupted. “No ‘Bokuto-san!’ You’re my friend and I’m sticking around until you tell me to leave!” 

“But why?” Akaashi shook his head. “I don’t…”

“What?” Bokuto tilted his head to the side.

“Ever since I joined the volleyball team, even before I was practicing full time with the regulars, you talked to me. Sometimes you’d work with me even though Coach would yell at you. At first, I thought it was just because you wanted to help out the first years, but then I realized it was only me. Why? Why have you been talking to me since the beginning?”

Before Bokuto could answer, Akaashi started coughing again. The medicine wouldn’t start working for a little while, so he was trying his best not to cough too much, but there was only so much he could do. When his coughing finished, Akaashi felt a little lightheaded again and Bokuto waited quietly for a moment before standing and checking to make sure Akaashi finished his soup. Akaashi closed his eyes for a moment, taking a few breaths. 

Just as he was catching his breath, arms were pulling him out of a sitting position. Akaashi panicked, his eyes flying open as he realized Bokuto had picked him up. 

“Bokuto!” Akaashi shouted, throwing his arms around Bokuto’s neck. “What are you doing?” 

“You should lay down,” Bokuto explained. “At least until the medicine starts working.” 

“I can walk, Bokuto-san,” Akaashi said, adrenaline fading but not his fluttering heart. 

Bokuto didn’t respond and didn’t say anything else until Akaashi was tucked into bed. He’d insisted Akaashi take off his mask so he could breathe better even though Akaashi said he didn’t want to risk getting Bokuto sick. 

“Thanks for everything,” Akaashi said when Bokuto sat next to Akaashi’s bed, “But you don’t have to stay.” 

“I’ll go if you need to sleep, but I… I want to stay.” 

“Okay…” Akaashi wasn’t sure what he could say to that. Bokuto had his back against the bed so Akaashi couldn’t even see his face right now. He had no way to read Bokuto, at least not while he was sick and sleepy. 

“Do you still want me to answer your questions?”

“Hmm?” 

“About why I wanted to be friends with you.”

“Oh…” Akaashi bit his lip. “Sure.” 

“It’s kind of a long story, but hopefully I won’t have to tell the whole thing.

Back in my first year of high school, I didn’t have a great time. I’d like to think that I’m a pretty nice person, I guess, but at that point, I wasn’t… I didn’t really know what I was doing. I got bullied a lot because I wasn’t very good in school and I wasn’t very good at social… stuff. Even volleyball wasn’t going great. I wasn’t exactly short at the time, but I wasn’t tall either. It was not a good time. The bullying wasn’t… that bad, but sometimes they took my stuff and, like, hid it. One day in the middle of the year, they threw it into a tree and I couldn’t reach it. I couldn’t even climb the tree because I couldn’t reach any of the low branches. I’m pretty sure I’d given up and was just leaning my head against the tree when someone tapped me on the shoulder.”

“Oh,” Akaashi said quietly, realizing why this all sounded so familiar. 

“Yep,” Bokuto said, a smile obvious in his words. “You were taller than me then and you helped me get my stuff out of the tree. You weren’t wearing a uniform, but I wasn’t sure who you could be so I sorta’ assumed you were an upperclassman. Then my second year of school, there you were, a first year on the volleyball team.” 

“You looked so different,” Akaashi said, though as he thought about the hazy memory of the day he visited Fukurodani High School and helped a kid get his stuff out of a tree he realized that the kid’s eyes had been unmistakably Bokuto’s. “You never said anything.”

“Well… you didn’t realize who I was and I guess I was kind of embarrassed. I wanted you to think I was cool.” 

Akaashi snorted, making himself cough a little. “That’s really dumb.” 

“Akaashi, that’s mean,” Bokuto complained. “But, like, yeah, that’s why I worked with you during volleyball practice.” 

Bokuto fell silent, but Akaashi could feel that he had more he wanted to say. Sure enough, after almost a minute of silence, Bokuto continued. 

“One day I was by your classroom at lunch—I don’t really remember why—and I saw you were eating lunch alone. So I decided to eat lunch with you.”

“Really?” Akaashi tried to shake his head, quickly realizing that not only was that hard to do lying down, but it was also a bad idea since he was still a little lightheaded. “You’re too nice. This is why I ended up with a stupid crush.” 

Bokuto turned to look at Akaashi, who just stared at Bokuto for a few moments before Bokuto opened his mouth. It took him a few moments to decide what he wanted to say, though. 

“You had a crush on me?” 

Akaashi’s eyes widened and enough extra blood rushed to his cheeks that he was sure he was going to exacerbate his fever. He’d meant to think the thing about having a crush on Bokuto, but his lightheaded, tired, sick brain had apparently crossed some wires. 

Of course, he realized that his use of past tense had given him an out. He could lie and say he had a crush, but not anymore. He could agree with Bokuto’s question and let Bokuto do the lying on his own, saving Akaashi from his problem of not being able to lie to Bokuto. 

But…

Maybe it was because he was sick or maybe it was because he was realizing how fast the end of the year was approaching.

He couldn’t say why, but he didn’t feel like lying to Bokuto. 

“Yes,” Akaashi said, feeling like he was going to throw up. “And… I guess I still do.” 

Bokuto turned fully to look at Akaashi and Akaashi could barely keep from turning away. Between the embarrassment and the fever, he was sure his entire face was red. On top of that, he felt incredibly nauseous and he was pretty sure that wasn’t because of the illness. 

“I didn’t want to say anything because I didn’t want to… mess this up.” 

"Mess what up?" Bokuto asked, his lack of an answer to Akaashi's admittance making Akaashi feel worse. 

"Us?" Akaashi hated the way he turned that into a question. "You're... you're my best friend." 

"Oh," Bokuto nodded, his face more thoughtful that was necessary for this situation. "That's stupid." 

Akaashi gave Bokuto a disbelieving look, feeling a little annoyed. 

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Well," Bokuto turned fully to look at Akaashi, pulling his knees up to his chest so he could lean his chin on them. His eyes were wide and he wasn't smiling, his face looking almost serious. "Because I like you too." 

"Oh." Akaashi wondered if his fever had caused him to start hallucinating. He turned over, propping himself up slightly on his elbow. "You, umm... huh?" 

Bokuto got into a kneeling position, scooting to the edge of Akaashi's bed. He put his face close to Akaashi's—his eyes big and nearly unblinking—and Akaashi felt like his heart was going to beat out of his chest. 

"Bokuto-san, I'm going to get you sick," Akaashi said, trying his best not to breath on Bokuto too much. 

"Akaashi." 

"Yes?" Akaashi asked, not sure what was happening, but sure that it was going to kill him. 

"You're very attractive. You're very smart. You're a very good setter. You're my best friend and I like you a lot." 

Bokuto leaned over quickly, kissing Akaashi awkwardly. Akaashi was too surprised and feverish to do much more than lay there in confusion. When he pulled away, Bokuto was redder than Akaashi felt and he tipped backward, falling hard into a sitting position. 

"Sorry, that was my first kiss," Bokuto admitted sheepishly. "Also I just, like, did it." 

"Bokuto-san, I'm going to get you sick," Akaashi repeated, his mind reeling and unable to properly put together what just happened. "And Konoha-san will definitely figure out how you got sick." 

"Oh, umm, sorry?" Bokuto looked almost regretful. "Wait, what?" 

"Konoha-san has been trying to get me to..." Akaashi's mind suddenly caught up with what was happening. "Bokuto-san, did you really just kiss me? I need to make sure I'm not hallucinating." 

Bokuto looked confused for a moment before laughing, "I'm pretty sure I'm not a hallucination." 

"That's what a hallucination would say," Akaashi grumbled, dropping onto his back to stare up at the ceiling. 

After a moment of thinking, his brain further clarified that, in fact, Bokuto had kissed him and it had been so bad that it had to be real. He covered his face with his hands for a few moments, hoping to tame the fire in his cheeks. It didn't work particularly well, but it did give him enough time to form a more cohesive thought. 

"I can't believe you kissed me." 

"Well, I like you and you like me and I guess it felt like a good idea."

Akaashi turned to look at the still red-faced Bokuto, holding out a hand as his mind started to drift a little. 

"It was a good idea."

Bokuto perked up, smiling as he grabbed onto Akaashi's hand. He moved so he was sitting with his back against Akaashi's bed, reaching up so Akaashi could keep his arm on the bed. 

"Akaashi, do you think we'll always be friends?" 

"I think so, Bokuto-san," Akaashi said as the medicine took hold, making him sleepy. "I hope so." 

"I hope so too," Bokuto said, falling silent as Akaashi drifted further and further into sleep.

The last thing Akaashi remembered before he was taken by a dreamless sleep was the comfortable warmth of Bokuto's hand in his.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading this silly little thing I wrote!
> 
> Also, if by some small chance you're also reading Our Eyes Are Full of Stars (unlikely, it's a different fandom and a completely different type of story), I know I said I'd have the next chapter out in December, but NaNoWriMo kicked my ass. 
> 
> If you liked this, consider liking and commenting! It means a lot to me <3


End file.
